Spirituality is deeply personal.
Spirituality is often defined as a connection to something bigger than ourselves. It can help us find meaning, purpose, comfort, and strength as we navigate life’s challenges. Religion includes the rituals and beliefs that help us practice our spirituality. When we experience challenges with religion or spirituality, it can cause a significant amount of distress.
Sometimes religion causes more pain than comfort.
When someone uses God, religion, or spiritual authority to control, punish, shame, or harm others, it is called spiritual abuse. Spiritual abuse can contribute to religious trauma, especially when harm comes from a trusted leader, community, family system, or high-control belief system.
Experiencing spiritual abuse or religious trauma can be deeply confusing. The place, people, or beliefs that once provided comfort may now be a source of pain. This can lead to a faith crisis, faith transition, or faith deconstruction.
Shifting beliefs can be destabilizing.
We are not meant to stay the same, but change can be painful and disorienting. During a faith crisis or when going through faith deconstruction, it may feel like the ground has given way beneath you. When that shift is connected to religious trauma or spiritual abuse, the grief, fear, anger, and confusion can feel even more complex.
Religious trauma can affect every area of life.
Religious trauma may contribute to anxiety, depression, religious scrupulosity, relationship challenges, loss of meaning, identity confusion, and difficulty functioning. It can also be painful to navigate relationships with people who may not understand what you are experiencing.
Some people find themselves in a mixed-faith marriage after religious trauma or faith deconstruction. What once felt like the glue holding the relationship together may suddenly become a source of conflict, distance, or disconnection.
Healing is possible.
I have the most experience working with current and former members of the LDS/Mormon church, Two by Twos, and other Christian denominations, but I welcome clients from all religious and faith backgrounds. I also work with cult survivors.
Faith deconstruction does not have to mean faith destruction.
For clients who want to reconstruct their faith after deconstruction, or who want their religious beliefs incorporated into therapy, I also offer spiritual integration and faith-based counseling. I honor each client’s belief system and will not impose values or push clients to stay in or leave any particular religion or church. You get to decide what you believe and how you choose to express that belief. For those seeking spiritual integration, the focus is on healthy spirituality, regardless of religious affiliation or beliefs.
